Roberta Teller Learns Lessons From a 13 Year Old Kid With a Long Rap Sheet

I first met Julio when he stood outside of my first ever teaching job - class 6-3 at PS 116  in Brooklyn, New York in September of 1968.  I was 21 years old and fresh out of college. While I had not as yet met him, I already knew that he was the Number 1 behavior problem and allegedly  completely out of control wreaking havoc both in the classroom and wherever he went in the building. Thirteen years old and he had a long rap sheet.....Nobody wanted him in their classroom. He was on my class list. We’d be spending a year together.  “What would that be like”?  I shuddered to think about it. 

At first I didn’t know who this boy was who was checking me out, peeking in and out of the door of my classroom as I was setting up and getting ready for the first day of school. It seemed kinda sweet to me; this lone kid wanting to see who his new teacher would be.......

I walked outside to say hello to this curious child and to introduce myself.  I was taken aback when I asked his name and he told me it was Julio.  There I was face to face with the enemy......Number 1 behavior problem of PS 116.   Mrs. Steinberg vs Julio.....Or was it going to be JULIO destroys Mrs. Steinberg?     OY!

He had a beautiful face, almost angelic.  For someone who loomed so large  in the annals of PS 116 lore, he was much smaller in stature than I expected and he seemed quite shy and vulnerable.  Could this really be PS 116’s  Public  Enemy Number 1 ?????    Sometimes I marvel that there was not one moment of hesitation as I took his hands in mine and told him how happy I was to meet him. I invited him into our classroom.  We perused the room together and I asked his opinion about colors for the bulletin boards. He helped me cut out the letters for the displays. We talked about sports and music. He told me he lived with his father and 2 younger sisters.  He stuttered.....quite badly.  

And he stayed for most of the afternoon.  All the while, he was polite, courteous and sweet.

I did not see him again until the first day of school. While we had a very friendly prior connection, I really didn’t know what to expect when school opened right after Labor Day.   After all, Julio had a reputation to uphold.  Would I become part of his legacy? Of course he would have to test me......in front of the entire class,. Didn’t he? 

I guess you could say he did and he didn’t.  He showed up on the late side that first day.   From my point of view, sending him to the office or to the Principal was out of the question - at least for the short term.  I welcomed him again, reminded him what time school started and assigned him his seat. He settled in and so began my first day.  Test 1.....  I passed.  Phew!

That whole school year from 1968-1969, I never had a big enough problem with Julio that required me to send him to Mr. Kash the Principal or to the office.  Yes, sometimes he was a bit naughty and silly and goofy, but whatever it was, I dealt with it within the confines of the classroom as I did with most behavior problems. With clear rules and expectations, coupled with appropriate consequences for missteps I treated Julio with the same respect that I afforded any other child in my room.  Yeah, sometimes, silly, sometimes goofy, but NEVER was this child disrespectful or rude to me.......NEVER!  That’s not to say he wasn’t trouble when he went elsewhere in the building. He could very easily live up to his reputation in a heartbeat.  But within the confines of class 6 -3,  he was just another kid.  I think he liked that. I actually think it was a relief for him. 

What does this say?  What does it mean when a brand new teacher simply and innocently embraces the most notorious worst kid of the school and discovers his good qualities..... ?   What does it say about a system that systematically stigmatizes and ostracizes a child rather than finding ways to include him and help him? 

It’s been almost 45 years since I taught my first class. It amazes me that I can not only remember the names of many of my first students, Rose Marie, Violet, Margaret, Manuel, Gregory......I remember details about many of them.....I used to think that Margaret, a very large and extremely smart girl who looked a lot older than 11  was a spy placed in my classroom whose job it was to report to the administration all of my failings......Rose Marie wrote long letters to me extolling how much she loved being in my classroom and what a wonderful teacher I was.  (She must have been there to counter Margaret). And the sweet little boy whose name I can’t remember, yet I can clearly see his face full of tears, sobbing because I decided not to pass him to 7th grade.  To this day, I wonder if I did the right thing.  And of course Julio, the boy who left a lasting impression on me.  The boy who informed much of my teaching and classroom management for years to come. 

Yes, I was Julio’s 6th grade teacher.  I believe that I gave Julio a good year at PS 116.  I provided a place where he could feel safe and just be a kid for those hours spent in class 6 - 3. I hope he learned some things about reading, writing and math and about life as well. 

And Julio was my teacher too. I got a life long lesson right from the get go of my career to absolutely NEVER pre-judge or accept others opinions, attitudes and assumptions about a child. As often happens in families, I saw how school cultures and climates find “identified patients” or in this case “identified students” who bear the brunt and burden of the dysfunctional systems and become the target - saving the institution from looking at itself.  So much easier to blame the kid....

Julio taught me that every child, especially, the challenging ones, deserves a chance. And when given a fair chance, can rise to his greater potential. Pre-conceived and institutionalized attitudes may serve the adults, but certainly not the child. Opening your heart, I learned, is a key connector, opening channels that would otherwise stay closed. 

I would be the first one to tell you that rules are important in the classroom. I am a firm believer that students interpret rules as, “I love you.”  And they will push you to the limit testing those boundaries......over and over again.......Yes, I love you I would be saying  as I set boundaries and limits and consequences.  

On that late August afternoon, when Julio appeared at the door to my classroom, I learned a very important rule that I have fondly called, “my favorite  F word”..........FLEXIBILITY.   On that day in 1968 when Julio first appeared at my door, more than likely, he was not supposed to be in the building.  According to the “rulebook”, I probably should have sent him away.  But what would have happened, and more importantly, what would NOT have happened had I sent him away?  I cringe at the thought. 

Julio faded from my life a year or two after he left my classroom.  In actuality, I watched from afar  as he was slowly  swallowed up by the allure and camaraderie of the emerging gang culture of east New York.  Eventually, he completely disappeared from my life.

Over these 45 years since Julio graced my life, I have remembered him to friends, lovers, fellow teachers......really anyone who would listen to my tales about  this notorious, rogue 6th grader and how he succeeded in my classroom, despite all the odds stacked against him. 

Thank you Julio for showing me early on in my career how a little love and acceptance and attention and good boundaries and flexibility can make all the difference in a child’s life-at least while they’re in my classroom. You left your mark on me and as a result on the hundreds and hundreds of students who followed you-especially the notorious ones.